Today is a weird day, in my mind. This is very close to the day when my husband left me with a 9 week old baby, 6 years ago. This is the day Shawn was arrested, two years ago. This is the day the judge gave for his death, 3 months ago. If I choose to focus on all of that, I’m an angry mess. It’s my choice.
So instead of focusing in on the pain and devastation that Shawn/Satan brought, today I’m choosing to focus on the miracles. God removed a violent, abusive husband from a battered, broken wife and her sweet, innocent baby. God put shackles on a calculated murderer who wreaked havoc and brought deep mourning to many families. God has given me a voice to share my story so other women don’t have to walk alone.
I don’t have it all together. Some days my body still reacts to the trauma it’s gone through. I’m not always as strong as I try to show others I am. I don’t have all the answers but friend, I have Him. And that is all I need. He is healing our brokenness. He is showing how close He was in every painful situation. He has gently reached down and pulled me closer when I struggled to trust Him. He is One who deserves all our praise. So with the rest of my life, I will do my best to choose Him. In every hard, in every hurt – He is beyond worthy.
Father, I thank you for our lives. I thank you for the pain. I trust You. Thank you for a love I have never known before in my undeserved gift of Vi. I am forever Yours.